
“The only constant in life is change.” Those words, spoken by Heraclitus more than two thousand years ago, still ring true today. Change is part of being human. Sometimes we choose it. Sometimes it chooses us. It always transforms us.
Two years ago, my husband Gary and I faced an unexpected and painful change. While enjoying vacation in Nova Scotia, our beloved German Shepherd, Niles, suddenly became ill and died. We were devastated. We had just celebrated his 10th birthday and were looking forward to several more years of adventures together. We cut our trip short and drove home through a blur of tears. It was a painful reminder of how quickly life can shift.
In my work, I walk with people through change—births, weddings, deaths, endings, and new beginnings. I see how change requires us to pause. It asks us to slow down, to feel what we’re feeling, and to (eventually) find meaning in the transition. In the words of Pema Chödrön, “Let difficulty transform you. And it will. In my experience, we just need help learning how not to run away.”
Running away is tempting, isn’t it? When life feels uncertain or painful, we distract ourselves, stay busy, or numb. But incorporating change into our lives requires our presence. We must hold the emotion, sit with the discomfort, and listen for the thread—the quiet but steady line of love and meaning that runs through it all. As William Stafford wrote:
“There’s a thread you follow. It goes among things that change. But it doesn’t change. While you hold it you can’t get lost. Tragedies happen; people get hurt or die; and you suffer and get old. Nothing you do can stop time’s unfolding. You don’t ever let go of the thread.”
For Gary and me, that thread was love. We remembered Niles by telling stories, looking at photos, and even placing a memorial stone in our yard. Two months later, that thread of love led us to Nigel, a deaf puppy who needed a home. We weren’t planning on another dog so soon, but something in our hearts said, this is your next step… and we felt like Niles would be pleased.
Change doesn’t always require will-power and determination. In fact, most often it is something we must pause to nurture. This isn’t easy in a culture that prizes achievement and productivity. We are encouraged to strive, stay busy, and measure our worth by what we accomplish. But real transformation happens in the pauses…. those moments when we give ourselves permission to slow down, rest, and simply be present with what is unfolding.
I love what Tricia Hersey, founder of The Nap Ministry, says about rest. She calls rest a revolutionary act. “We are not resting to recharge so we can do more,” she writes. “We are simply just resting. We are resting because it is our divine and human right.”
Change (personal and collective) requires this kind of pause, this kind of divine-right-rest. It calls for moments of reflection, deep breaths, and permission to simply be. Without that stillness, we can miss the wisdom rising within us.
If you are walking through change right now, whether chosen or not, I invite you to slow down. Hold the thread that is most real for you: love, hope, faith, or connection. Take a nap. Light a candle. Let yourself feel what you feel. You don’t need to have it all figured out.
Change invites us into a sacred space, a space between what was and what will be. In your journey with change, may you find the courage to be fully present with whatever arises, the gentle wisdom to honor your own pace, and the comfort that comes from trusting transformation is always possible – even when it feels uncertain.
- What “thread” are you holding onto right now?
- Is there a change in your life that you need to pause and honor, rather than rush through?
- What practices—rest, journaling, conversation—help you stay grounded during transitions?
If you find yourself needing guidance or companionship as you navigate change, I offer Spiritual Direction and Grief Companionship. These are spaces of listening, reflection, and support, where you can explore your inner life, honor your experiences, and discover meaning in the midst of transition. You can reach out to learn more or schedule a free 45-minute intro session.

❤️🐾❤️Sent from my iPad
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